Santa, Mrs. Claus, and our elf pose in front of the oldest remaining Dutch farmhouse in Manhattan. Photo by S. Braun

Santa — or rather my friend who portrays him — instantly “married” me as he came into view. 

I happened to be waiting for him by the trailers of Holy Trinity Church Inwood, the church’s temporary headquarters during renovations. I could just see the white beard and the top of his cap bobbing along near Academy Street here in Upper Manhattan. 

My friend’s son, dressed as an elf, bobbed along beside him. So not only was I matched with a text-to-order spouse, I now had a 9-year-old son who was trying to keep up with his much taller dad. 

I had always wanted a child! How lovely not to go through the birthing process or have to worry about this sweet boy’s dental care or college fund.

With six feet between us, Santa and I waved, solidifying our social bubble in the changeable land of COVID-19. 

My friend had donned a red suit with white trim. And I wore an Edwardian-inspired walking suit with a green waistcoat and a long red skirt striped down the front with sequin panels of red, green, and gold.

“Merry Christmas!” my new son and hubby called to me. 

“Merry Christmas!” I shouted back.

All three of us wore masks. 

My cell phone marked the time as 4:45 PM. Now a ready-made family of three, we were running late. I hate being late. Then I reminded myself of our very loose plans. We were to walk up Broadway to wish business owners a Merry Christmas. This would be a goofy surprise, not a sanctioned event.

During the pandemic, there was no hurry because there was nowhere to go. Here in New York City, indoor dining was suspended to prevent the spread of the coronavirus. The vibrant neighborhood had put on an ill-fitting coat of stillness.

Four Decembers ago, I had gotten the idea to become Mrs. Claus for a RING Garden tree lighting. The organizers were good-natured enough to say “yes,” even though they had no idea what to do with Santa’s wife as a party guest. I had no idea myself. 

As a 40-something-year-old former dancer, I thought it would be fun to have a seasonal performing gig. Male actor friends put on the red suit each year, and I wanted to “fly” like them, even if going airborne was only pretend. Becoming a Claus would give me performing opportunities I could grow into as I aged. With my type-A personality, I took my interest to the next level. 

I graduated from Charles W. Howard Santa Claus School in 2018. I became the founding president of the New York City Santas in February 2020, when “coronavirus” was just crazy talk instead of a real threat that would affect the entire human race.

Santa, our son, and I passed the outdoor porches of the Dyckman Street restaurants. “Merry Christmas!” Cameras came out of bags. A few customers got up from their tables to snap selfies (elfies).

Photo by S. Braun

We approached Starbucks on Broadway and Dyckman and discussed our route. We would travel north on both the east and west side of Broadway and knock on windows. This was going to be a-m-a-z-i-n-g!

Tonight, the day after the conjunction, when Jupiter and Saturn were so close to each other they could have been planetary lovers, weather was mild. I wore only one skirt this evening, instead of doubling up with the heavy green satin petticoat I liked during freezing events. The ground and bits of sidewalk were still dotted with sharp shards of brown and black snow left from an earlier storm. 

Santa and I knocked on the windows of Starbucks. The employees inside waved vigorously.  Bob in the Broadyke Meat Market was there, friendly as always.

And up we went, like trick-or-treaters.

Our journey included visits to dollar stores, barbershops, and a tattoo parlor. 

Photo by S. Braun

The Christmas tree guys, Samuel and Hasaan, were gone from their spot by Rite Aid on the east side. It was three days before Christmas, and they were sold out of trees. 

The fellas at the outdoor fry-up on 207th yelled, “Hey!” They all knew Santa.

So did the man who runs the Halal truck across the street on the west side.

Photo by S. Braun

At Queens Nail Salon, my favorite manicurists came out to snap our photos and pose in front of the store.

Photo by S. Braun

Photo by S. Braun

We Clauses were having so much fun. Imagine knocking on a shop window dressed like a yuletide explosion during a global pandemic. It’s such a rush.

Here’s what I noticed: 

• First, taco places are big now in Inwood. It’s a trend. 

• Second, restaurant owners are trying their darndest to adapt to constantly changing rules. Tubby Hook, for instance, has a plastic-covered front enclosure with a see-through roof to provide more warmth in the day. 

• Third, many businesses are dark with “for rent” signs in front. I can’t even remember what was in some of these places, but I feel an ambiguous loss for what is no longer there

Photo by S. Braun

Finally, I noted how little it takes to make people happy. All we did was knock and wave. And our neighbors gobbled up joy.

Speaking of which, please enjoy this wonderful slide show of our adventure. All photos by S. Braun.

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FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

NEW YORK, NEW YORK, Sept. 30, 2020—Santa George McTyre, secretary of the New York City Santas, has painstakingly numbered each line of “A Visit from St. Nicholas,” also known as “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas.”

McTyre’s meticulous attention to detail is in preparation of the chapter’s Oct. 18 collaboration with dozens of Santas reciting the famous poem by Clement Clarke Moore. By the way, Moore was a New Yorker and the subject of one of our earlier talks in 2020. McTyre has organized similar dramatic table reads live on Zoom and Facebook, including All About Eve and A Midsummer Night’s Dream.

So far, more than a dozen distinguished Santas from around the country are participating, from coast to coast. A reporter from the Times of London.

To be part of this first-ever global event or cover it for media opportunities, please email us at nycsantas@gmail.com with “Night Before Christmas” in the subject line. McTyre will assign you a bit to practice and perform on the day of the event.

Nervous about performing live on Oct. 18? We present Santa Public Speaking: 101. Recently, McTyre and Santa Gary Dreifus, vice president of the New York City Santas, led a Zoom lecture about public speaking to promote the chapter’s commitment to education. In case you missed these two charismatic guys riffing off each other and other guests, click here. Below are highlights from the Sept. 13 lecture about safely and effectively using your voice to polish presentation skills:

Tips from Vice President Santa Gary Dreifus. Dreifus, professor of Magic at the Coney Island Sideshow School, is often amazed that some Santas appear grim when they speak in front of crowds. Santas with big moustaches may consider a trim for optimum visibility. “Take your time,” he said. “Stop. Look at your audience, smile, and then go into your reading. Establish rapport using your presence. Try to look at everyone in the audience and smile. You have all been working on your smile for years.”

And like a good performer who notices his audience, Dreifus looked at all the Santas grinning in gallery view and said: “I saw that Bob. I’m blinded.”

Dreifus’ other tips include making a list of what you want to say and print it out in a large font. Sip water in bottles not covered in labels or distracting branding or logos. If people in the audience want to speak and seem shy, try not to talk over them. Instead, acknowledge them. If possible, ask if you can get back to them at the end of the performance, so as not to interrupt flow.

Tips from Secretary George. McTyre has bachelors and masters degrees in vocal performance. He was also a professional opera singer for 15 years. Being a Claus, though, has its own challenges to the voice. Christmas characters are expected to speak to children and adults for hours at a time over loud soundtracks, he says, as he did when he first started out as an elf on the Essex Steam Train. 

This year, he anticipates long stretches talking into devices for remote visits.

Here’s what McTyre suggests:

• Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Use the singers’ mantra of “pee pale.” You can guess what that means, but we’ll spell it out. Drink enough H20 that your urine is clear instead of dark yellow.

• Warm up for 15 minutes before a gig. This means humming and these other exercises: 

  • Lip bubble blow bubble on a sound

  • Vocal slides, for example, “eeeeee” from high to low to high to strengthen the entire range of your voice.

  • Try tongue twisters two or three times emphasizing consonants to make your words clearly understood in noisy conditions.

• Sound like yourself. To protect your voice and to be authentic, use your own God-given voice.

• Buy the right equipment. A lavalier mic for $20 can amplify your voice, so you don’t have to push. Buy two or three in case you step on one

• Breathe. Try taking in breath to the waistband of your pants like an accordion. Breathe low and all around your body for supported, consistent air floor through the voice box. This will save you from getting vocal issues like polyps and from developing the “vocal fry,” a pet peeve of casting directors. For a reading, mark out good places to take a quick breath.

• Never use throat numbing sprays like Chloroseptic. These medicines kill the top layer of cells in your throat.

• Avoid alcohol and caffeine. These drinks dry out the vocal apparatus. Instead try this recipe recommended to McTyre by a soprano at the Metropolitan Opera:

  • One cup of warm water

  • Add a few drops of any kind of vinegar

  • Sprinkle in a bit of salt

  • ¼ of a teaspoon of olive oil

  • Gargle for 30 seconds. Hold the drink in your mouth for a full minute, and you will be able to sing for an hour, even if you have a cold.

Finally, both McTyre and Dreifus recommend this laptop stand from AmazonBasics. With free hands and proper posture, even during virtual performances, you will be able to access your best breath support. And, you will be less likely to have your laptop fall on the floor.

The NYC Santas is a new chapter of the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas. Founded in February 2020, this new group has been meeting virtually since March and has created important lectures to help Santas (all genders of Christmas characters) to improve performance skills.

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Related Article: NYC Santas Visit Clement Clarke Moore’s Desk Virtually

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Lonnie Cooper as a Macy’s Santa

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

NEW YORK, NEW YORK, June 2, 2020—As an entertainment professional, Lonnie Cooper has performed “every job you can possibly imagine,” including road manager, actor, producer, and elephant sanitation in the Big Apple Circus.

But when he became a Macy’s Santa in 2014, he sat in the most famous Santa chair in the world.

“It’s not a stretch to say it saved my life,” he said.

Lonnie joined the New York City Santas on May 17 as a special guest. The Michigan native and Manhattan resident talked about the store’s identical suits, multiple Santas in multiple houses, the new acceptance of real beards, and David Sedaris’ Santaland Diaries.

What does Lonnie want for Christmas? For Santaland to open this December 2020.

Enjoy the video here.

Upcoming online talks include:

Sunday, June 7, 3 PM: “Meet Timothy Connaghan, also known as ‘National Santa.’” Postponed as of 6/6/20. We will do this one another time.

Sunday, June 14, 3 PM: “Dream It ... Design It, Virtual Visits” with Deanna Golden and Judi Broderick of Santa Nana’s Holiday University. This NYC Santas exclusive is only for Clauses living in the tri-state area or who perform here each season. This brainstorming session gets into the details of what you will actually do during virtual visits. Deanna and Judi will host on WebEx, a platform some families may prefer to Zoom. If you are an NYC Santa, please email nycsantas@gmail.com to register by June 11.

Wednesday, July 1, 3 PM (30 minutes): “Naughty or Nice: NYC Santas Interview a Wall Street Journal Reporter.” Afraid to talk to journalists? Let’s pull out our own pens and notebooks to fire pressing questions at Anne Kadet of the Wall Street Journal. What do reporters look for in a juicy story? How do they create headlines that drive traffic? And how as Clauses can we help out members of the media and feel more comfortable as ourselves while in character? This may be a thorny year for news coverage. Develop confidence in preparation of the “green journalism” days of December. Click here to register.

Stay tuned for late summer and fall discussions about whether or not Santa does magic. Yes, this is a controversial topic. Also, we will try to cover more serious subjects, including how to talk to children and families who’ve lost loved ones during COVID-19.

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Reno Venturi is in the top left. Look at that beard! How is he not a Claus already?

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

NEW YORK, NEW YORK, May 15, 2020—Reno Venturi, owner of Actors Gym, in Hamden, Conn., should consider being a Santa Claus. With a healthy beard and a middle name reminiscent of everyone’s favorite reindeer, he could certainly develop his own particular brand of Santa.

And branding is important. That’s why Reno commended unique traits in his New York City Santas lecture called “Getting Ahead with a Headshot.” Not only should you pay for a good headshot, in the range of $150 to $200 that shows the catch lights in your eyes, it should highlight personality, he says. A second headshot might depict Santa off-season, in golf wear or with a bird on his shoulder, as illustrated by one of the participants who attends these Zoom session with his feathered friend.

If you send thank you cards to a casting agency after an audition, print one of these pictures on the back to make you stand out and make yourself memorable.

The next NYC Santas talk, “Meet Me at Macy’s” is Sunday May 17 at 3 PM, which happens to be a popular Santa’s birthday. Stay tuned to learn which of us is one year older while in quarantine.

Our special guest is Lonnie Cooper, an entertainment professional, who has worked with the Big Apple Circus and the Moscow Ballet. Any job you can name in showbiz, he’s done it. He is also a Macy’s Santa who has witnessed the department store’s acceptance of real beards among Christmas performers.

Lonnie will talk for a few minutes about his audition, “the look,” and favorite moments in the famous chair. Another prominent Macy’s Santa may also join in the discussion. Keep your eyes peeled for a man whose name rhymes with “blarney.” We will then open the discussion to NYC Santas and our new friends from around the country.

Please register in advance for this meeting:
https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/tJEsd-ippzgvGdFp1Yiw6BfbCTihgKl3py8z

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Santas waiting to speak to Debra Schimdt Bach of the New-York Historical Society. Before the talk, a poll asked participants how many of them use “A Visit from St. Nicholas” in their role as Santa. Of the 10 who answered, 60% work with the poem and 40% do not.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK, April 22, 2020—Debra Schimdt Bach, curator of decorative arts at the New-York Historical Society, said she wishes all of her Zoom conferences ended with a group ho-ho-ho with 20 Santas.

Entitled “Sit (Virtually) at the Desk of Clement Clarke Moore,” the talk was tailored to educate the New York City Santas, a new chapter of the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas (IBRBS). 

During the pandemic, the NYC Santas have organized other virtual meetings open to Clauses throughout the nation. This 30-minute program was the first dedicated to Moore, who is credited for writing “A Visit from St. Nicholas,” better known as “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas.” 

To illustrate, Bach showed archival photographs of the “secretary/chest of drawers” that most likely belonged to Moore and most likely was the very piece of furniture on which he wrote his famous poem. 

“We believe it belonged to Moore and we believe that he wrote the poem,” Bach said.

The poem first appeared anonymously in the Troy Sentinel in 1823. Moore was not publicly attributed as the writer until 1837 when it was included in the New York Book of Poetry. He acknowledged authorship in 1838 and published it under his name in 1844.

So this time lag between when it first appeared and when he took credit has led to debate.

Moore was an Episcopalian minister and professor at the General Theological Seminary in Manhattan. Moore donated some of his inherited estate, called Chelsea, to the seminary. Other pieces of his property eventually formed Chelsea, the West Side neighborhood that still bears its name. Could Moore really have authored this beloved piece of American literature? Or was it someone else? According to Bach, most scholars believe Moore wrote the poem based on the syntax of his other writings.

Legend has it that Moore first recited it at his Chelsea home on Christmas Eve 1822 to entertain his many children. A theory is that a young Harriet Butler from Troy, New York, was also at that reading and recorded it in her personal copy book. Her father and Moore were close friends and fellow ministers. One of Harriet Butler’s brothers was named Reverend Clement Moore Butler, making her a leading candidate as the one who submitted the poem to the Troy Sentinel the following year.

“She was very much enamored with the poem,” Bach said of Harriet Butler, adding that the desk was donated to the New-York Historical Society in 1956 through Butler’s family. She never married. The item was handed down the family line through a cousin.

Bach also showed a handwritten black and white copy of the manuscript signed and dated by Moore in 1937 as a gift to the New-York Historical Society. Also in the society’s collection is an 1837 painting by Robert Walter Weir, entitled St. Nicholas, that depicts a fireplace and an elfin figure with his finger alongside his nose. One of the Santas in the talk noticed a broken clay pipe at the figure’s feet, which Bach attributed to a Dutch tradition of breaking pipes on St. Nicholas Day (December 6).

The painting reveals a “merging of ideas and influence” that developed a “public legacy” of a jolly character rather than the dour religious image from Europe. It also reveals a cultural movement meant to preserve New York’s Dutch heritage. Weir may have been inspired by Moore. Moore was certainly friendly with writer Washington Irving. Irving’s Knickerbockers History of New York first depicted a comedic version of St. Nicholas. In 1835, Irving founded the St. Nicholas Society, a social club for male ancestors of Dutch colonists. 

“Despite the fact that St. Nicholas was a Catholic saint, it appears that early Dutch New Yorkers really stayed true to celebrating St. Nicholas and revering him as a patron of children, as a patron of New Amsterdam,” Bach said. “I’ve also read that he was the patron saint of the greater colony of New York, although I’ve only read that in one place.”

In her research for this talk, Bach discovered that St. Nicholas is also the patron saint of her place of employment, the New-York Historical Society. 

“I think certainly St. Nicholas as we know him was a New York invention,” Bach said during the Q & A. “So, yes, it does appear that the whole idea of celebrating St. Nicholas in a very whole-hearted cultural way may have originated in the United States in early colonial New York.”

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You may go to YouTube for a recording of the talk that took place April 22, 2020.

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Our virtual background contest was so much fun. Read on to find who won. Photo by Anthony Piselli.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

NEW YORK, NEW YORK—Backgrounds may be all the rage this holiday season as Santas explore digital options during a global pandemic that discourages crowds. We are prepared to move forward whatever the odds.

On Sunday, April 19, we of the New York City Santas, a new chapter of the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas, hosted a tutorial called “Lights, Camera, Action: Technical Aspects of Online Santa Visits." [The recording of the program is linked at the end of this article.]

Ed Taylor from the Santa Claus Conservatory was our special guest and new hero. Who else would even attempt to host a six-hour World Wide Santa Summit spanning several time zones? And he’s doing it again soon.

Working with technology is an act of courage. It’s a live performance with many moving parts, as yours truly discovered Sunday when my screen did not show all of the 15 participants. And two officials of the NYC Santas had a hard time getting into the link 30-minutes before the 3 PM meeting. Some of that was part of a Mrs. Claus NYC glitch (clearing my throat) and a Zoom issue with so many people using the platform during COVID-19. A few others struggled with the passwords. Urgh! I know.

Ed showed us the secret behind his flickering lantern; you must watch the recording. He also showed various computer settings that change skin tone. Does he wear makeup? No, but other Santas may prefer the polished look. He tried on glasses as well to experiment with reflection. Can cell phone cameras work? Yes, of course.

[Click here for additional tips from Ed.]

We hope you feel encouraged. As Ed says, COVID-19 may provide new professional opportunities. You don’t have to live in Hollywood or New York anymore to audition for a part. (I myself haven’t “found” the background that speaks to me, but I will soon.)

Other helpful hints from participants included using a music stand to hold a phone steady for web-based Santa chats (thank you, Carol Baker Claus from Ohio). George McTyre, secretary of the NYC Santas, talked about lighting and also knows about wonderful free Zoom backgrounds. (Ask him about the General Hospital kitchen.) Another Santa (whom I couldn’t see because I couldn’t see anyone) puts a marker above his computer’s camera, so he always knows where to focus his eyes to prevent that “fish eye” look. Lonnie Cooper, a Santa at a big-box NYC store we all know, mentioned his predictions for the season; be prepared for anything.

Group participation tips for Santas conducting online meetings:

• Singing “Jingle Bells” as a group on Zoom may not be the way to go. There is a lag, which you must see in our recording toward the end. It’s funny.

• Group photos and videos in gallery view make colorful souvenirs for participants. Simply take a screen shot by hitting the print screen button at the top of your keyboard on your laptop or hitting your screenshot settings on your iPhone. Then immediately paste into an email to yourself for safekeeping. Make sure dialogue boxes and the chat feed is down, so you have a clean shot without embarrassing private conversations.

• Encourage participants to use their full names and their cities as if they were making a name tag for themselves. It’s professional and informative. Of course, if you are working as Santa for children, you would hover your mouse over your picture and click the three dots to rename yourself as Santa. I learned this from the crew of You Sleigh Me.

• Don’t be afraid to try contests. Why not? I think ours was successful. Gary Dreifus, VP of the NYC Santas, tabulated votes for best backgrounds through Zoom’s chat box.

Winners of the best backdrop contest were … drumroll, please … : Ed and Scott, who were tied

Honorable mention goes to: Anthony, Stephan, and Bert

The prizes were … nothing.

If you missed this discussion, no worries. Come to others and be an honorary New Yorker for this limited time:

Wednesday, April 22, 3-3:30 PM: “Visit Clement Clarke Moore’s Actual Desk, Virtually.” Debra Schmidt Bach, curator of decorative arts at the New-York Historical Society, will show us the actual desk on which Clement Clarke Moore wrote "A Visit from St. Nicholas," also known as "Twas the Night Before Christmas." Or did he? Yes, there is controversy about authorship. Our new friend Debra will tell us about the desk, the author, and whether or not he was the one who actually wrote this famous poem. Santas, bring your questions and your most groomed set of whiskers (real or honorary) for a fascinating online talk and post-session group photo. For extra credit, come prepared to recite a few lines by heart. For security reasons, please register here in advance.

Sunday, May 3, 3-4 PM, “Getting Ahead with a Headshot.” Reno Venturi of the Actors Gym will tell us all about why we need a headshot, what makes a good one, and how much we should expect to spend. For security reasons, please register here in advance. 

Sunday, May 17, 3-4 PM, “Meet Me At Macy’s.” Actor and NYC Santa Lonnie Cooper will share his favorite Macy's experiences. For security reasons, please register here in advance.

Meeting Recording of “Lights, Camera, Action: the Technical Aspects of Online Santa Visits,” April 19, 2020. Access Password: 2n@^410e

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Lonnie Cooper and me, Mrs. Claus NYC, performing together during the nightly 7 PM thank you to healthcare workers. Notice we are six feet apart.

Being inside our apartments has forced us here in NYC to “go inside,” an interesting concept as we continue to be in the epicenter of the nation’s COVID-19 outbreak.

Yet there is meaning here, particularly during Passover and Easter, as we hear of friends and loved ones simply passing away. We are not as independent as we would like to imagine ourselves. Our time on earth is limited, as we are reminded every time we hear a siren within our subdued city blocks.

In the midst of sadness, we Santas are skilled at finding the joy that exists for no scientific or mathematical reason. Whether that means dressing up to take out the garbage or shouting to the heavens during the 7 PM thank you to healthcare workers, we feel inklings of this peace that passes all human understanding.

At my virtual side, I have Vice President Gary Dreifus and Secretary George McTyre of the newly formed New York City Santas. When we had our official photos taken March 13, 2020 at the Penumbra Foundation, I had no idea that their physical embraces would be the last ones I would experience, perhaps for months. I couldn’t imagine that this trip downtown to East 30th Street would be the last time I would take the subway—for how long—no one knew. Weeks later, in spite of everything, I’m having such a good time with these guys from a distance. I mean, just look at us. We look like virus warriors as well as master time travelers.

The New York City Santas (from left to right): Gary Dreifus, Ann Votaw, George McTyre.

Tintype photo by Jolene Lupo of the Penumbra Foundation, March 13, 2020

Gary and I are now hosting a magic class for seniors and their grandchildren every Wednesday morning. George and I speak on the phone several times a week, or daily, just to check in and keep up with our new chapter of the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas (IBRBS).

On April 4, Gary, George, and I hosted our very first chapter meeting on Zoom. It was so much fun, we decided to do more online workshops and to declare all participants honorary New Yorkers for a year. Since then, I was so happy to be invited to a meeting with the “You Sleigh Me” crew that met virtually on Saturday. It’s impossible to feel hopeless with these Santas around. An hour later, I attended a virtual “Magic at Coney” magic show. Gary Dreifus was the host who brought together 50 participants of various age groups. A few of the performers were international, an extra special treat. See here for more info.

Joy is at the heart of a Christmas spirit that continues all year—perhaps forever and ever. Your presence increases our awareness of the goodness all around.

Please join us for the following free sessions:

Sunday, April 19, 3-4 PM: "Lights, Camera, Action: Technical Aspects of Online Santa Visits." Ed Taylor of the Santa Claus Conservatory will join us to discuss backdrops and his opinion of Zoom and other platforms to reach clients this season. We will have a virtual background contest with absolutely no prize whatsoever to the winner. In the last 15 minutes, we will ask people from the NYC area to stick around, so that we can collect your information and get a special photo with just us! For security reasons, please register here in advance. 

Wednesday, April 22, 3-3:30 PM (Confirmed): “Visit Clement Clarke Moore’s Actual Desk, Virtually.” Debra Schmidt Bach, curator of decorative arts at the New-York Historical Society, will show us the actual desk on which Clement Clarke Moore wrote "A Visit from St. Nicholas," also known as "Twas the Night Before Christmas." Or did he? Yes, there is controversy about authorship. Our new friend Debra will tell us about the desk, the author, and whether or not he was the one who actually wrote this famous poem. Santas, bring your questions and your most groomed set of whiskers (real or honorary) for a fascinating online talk and post-session group photo. For security reasons, please register here in advance.

Sunday, May 3, 3-4 PM, “Getting Ahead with a Headshot.” Reno Venturi of the Actors Gym will tell us all about why we need a headshot, what makes a good one, and how much we should expect to spend. For security reasons, please register here in advance. 

Sunday, May 17, 3-4 PM, “Meet Me At Macy’s.” Actor and NYC Santa Lonnie Cooper will share his favorite Macy's experiences. For security reasons, please register here in advance.

Should you ever have issues getting into a meeting, contact me at mrsclausnyc@gmail.com.

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Press Release

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

APRIL 4, 2020, NEW YORK CITY—Once 17 Santas figured out how to mute and unmute themselves on Zoom, they took turns introducing themselves and talking about their favorite quarantine snacks from Amish fare to tacos.

In Santa-speak, this “icebreaker” helped participants learn about Zoom, a digital platform made popular during the COVID-19 outbreak. The activity was also an act of solidarity showing that the corona virus affects all of us, throughout the world and our country.

Sponsored by the New York City Santas, a new chapter of the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas (IBRBS), the coffee talk welcomed other members outside of the tri-state area of NYC, New Jersey, and Connecticut.

As George McTyre, the new secretary stated, crowded venues may cancel or modify events. Malls will also change policies. Among Santas themselves, health issues make networking even more valuable in case any of them would ever become ill and need a substitute. Santas everywhere should take note and plan for changes in the upcoming 2020 season, he said.

Howie Bristow (MA), representing the North East region of IBRBS, and Deanna Golden (AZ), international secretary, spoke briefly during the call. The ISC-Atlanta has been rescheduled until Labor Day weekend, they said. Deanna also brought up IBRBS’ eight $250 scholarships and the extended application deadline. Future IBRBS programs will include panel discussions with various experts.

The general consensus is that most Santas will rely on technology to avoid spreading the coronavirus. Gary Dreifus, VP of the NYC Santas, has already turned to virtual magic classes. 

During the call, other Santas showed their backgrounds and discussed proper lighting, a must for the best presentation.

Other problem-solving ideas included six feet of space between guests in lines. As for give-aways, what about little bottles of “Santa-tizer,” made by North Pole elves? Santa David Mills of Staten Island, for example, uses sanitizers in the form of a pen. BRILLIANT!

The next discussion will most likely break down the concept of a “green screen.” Stay tuned and please like NYC Santas on Facebook and Instagram. To join our mailing list, email nycsantas@gmail.com.

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Attached: Santa Health During COVID-19 Slide Show, the spring 2020 issue of the IBRBS newsletter.

Related Article: NYC Soars With Its First Chapter of International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas

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FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

NEW YORK, NY—As of February 2020, New York City is now host to one of the 49 affiliated chapters of the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas (IBRBS), the largest Christmas organization in the world. This chapter is the first ever IBRBS group in NYC.

First lines of business include finalizing a name and logo. Stay tuned for a Facebook and Instagram presence along with a list of quarterly events support neighboring chapters, including the Lower Hudson Valley Santas.

President Ann Votaw, Vice President Gary Dreifus, and Secretary George McTyre have thus far discussed field trips, educational events, and meet and greets. One short-term goal is to generate a contact sheet for area Santas (all genders) who may need substitutes during the holiday season. Each event will feature the lastest news from the national IBRBS crew.

All Santas love a good story. Here’s how this one started. A small group of seven Clauses met for coffee Jan. 3, 2020 at the Winter Village at Bryant Park shortly after Christmas. Exhausted, they just wanted to hang out and review the last two busy months. Two of the guys walked from their temporary apartment near Radio City, where they may or may not have still been working. Wink! Wink!

This gathering kick-started the idea of a formal chapter representing Santas in all five boroughs, neighboring areas, and visitors who work in NYC during the season.

An especially big thank you to brothers in red, Keith Carson and Howard Graham, who are on the board of IBRBS. And additional thanks to Nicholas Alan Gillotte and Bernard Prior of the Lower Hudson Valley Santas. Other St. Nicks representing Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, and Connecticut came to the January coffee meet-up that caused “a stir” among tourists and customers in Bryant Park’s “The Lodge.” The more the merrier.

-###-

Photo by Kevin Hagen of the Wall Street Journal. Taken Dec. 3, 2019 and appearing in the publication on Dec. 10 online and Dec. 11 in print.

Oh, adrenaline has been pumping through my 500-year-old veins these past few weeks. Last Wednesday, the Wall Street Journal’s Anne Kadet profiled Mrs. Claus in a lovely Metro Money piece called: “‘Ring Your Bells, Sisters!’ Mrs. Claus Says.’" The column appeared online Dec. 10, but the same article took up an entire half page on Wednesday. On that morning, friends and acquaintances emailed me photos from their point of views above their morning papers. I could almost see their collective spray of coffee and hear their gasps of surprise.

That night, I met State Senator Robert Jackson in his offices in Inwood.

I got to meet a woman named Carmen Rojas, who was honored for her community activism on asbestos-related issues. The party happened on the same day the article came out, so I was better able to show and explain what Mrs. Claus does. I’m not Santa, but I can reach an audience in a different way.

Carmen Rojas was the evening’s person of honor. She is in the yellow scarf. So much positive energy in this line-up.

Since then, I have connected to the gorgeous Mrs. Claus mentioned in the piece. She calls herself Aurora Claus, and she is from the so-close-yet-so-faraway Lower Hudson Valley. I hope the WSJ story raises the visibility of female Clauses in NYC and around the country. And Aurora and I must must must meet.

This week, I wore my gorgeous new dress for a volunteer function in Upper Manhattan. To my surprise, two women asked if they could get men for Christmas. This is a new one for me. I told them that some things don’t fit under a tree. But had I been more nimble-minded, I would have said: “Oh, darlings. They have so many instructions. Are you ready for all that responsibility?”

Stay tuned for more about my new suit and the woman who made it for me.

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My first batch of gingerbread from a Dyckman Farmhouse recipe dating back to the 1600s. My recommendation? Chill the dough after folding in the warm molasses and cream. #stars #cookies #gingerbread #cookies

17 Likes, 1 Comments - Mrs. Claus NYC (@mrsclausnyc) on Instagram: "My first batch of gingerbread from a Dyckman Farmhouse recipe dating back to the 1600s. My..."

Earlier this year, culinary historian Lavada Nahon presented her gorgeous gingerbread recipe to the Dyckman Farmhouse Museum, the last existing farmhouse in Manhattan! And I was there undercover to taste and enjoy.

Recently, I tried my hand at this recipe originally seen in The Art of Cookery Made Plain and Easy, a book by Mrs. H. Glasse, published 1745 and 1796.

The first time I made them, they oozed out across the cookie sheets.

This second time, I discovered I need to chill the dough for more than an hour. Seems that pouring warm molasses and heavy cream into the butter and flour mixture melts the butter, a no no.

I have no idea what people in the 1700s did during this phase. Perhaps they just let the mixture sit for a moment in their freezing cold homes.

For more information, go to lavadanahon.com.

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To enter FAO Schwarz in Rockefeller Center is to walk in Oz. Each salesperson represents a distinct Technicolor realm of toys.

Sleeping now but not for long. Rockefeller Center's FAO Schwarz is hopping! #toys #christmas #november2019 #holidays #shopping #nyc #rockefellerplaza

11 Likes, 1 Comments - Mrs. Claus NYC (@mrsclausnyc) on Instagram: "Sleeping now but not for long. Rockefeller Center's FAO Schwarz is hopping! #toys #christmas..."

On this sunny day in October, Micah Feliciano, head of personal shopping, would help me on a challenging mission: learning as much about FAO’s 2019 shopping season in 15 minutes or less. As the oldest toy store in America, the one made famous in the 1988 movie Big, FAO is full of diversion. When I announced my arrival to an employee dressed as an astronaut, I determined I could easily take up 30 minutes on the first floor alone. 

Thanks for the tour, #faoschwarz! Mrs. C is now in the know, with help from the best toy store on earth! As you can see, the staff have rhythm. #toys #holidayshopping2019 #30rock #bigpiano #rockefeller

9 Likes, 0 Comments - Mrs. Claus NYC (@mrsclausnyc) on Instagram: "Thanks for the tour, #faoschwarz! Mrs. C is now in the know, with help from the best toy store on..."

“For my job interview here, I brought my puppet,” the astronaut told me while I waited for Micah. I asked him to repeat his statement, so I could let it fully absorb, but a Sharper Image 5 Inch Stunt Hand Controlled Lunar Drone flew by my head. Meanwhile, two employees raced by on light-up skates that hooked onto the heels of their shoes.

“Mrs. Claus!” exclaimed Micah when he saw me near the Melissa & Doug grocery store. “I’ve been working for you for years. Now I get to meet you in person.”

First, the tall, elegant Micah walked me back to the store’s entrance where we met two seasoned employees wearing uniforms in my favorite shade of Christmas red: Soldier Patrick standing outside the revolving doors and Soldier Johnny inside. Both had been with FAO when it was on Fifth Avenue, before this glorious new flagship store opened here on 30 Rock in 2018. 

Second, Micah showed me the menagerie of plush animals on the right and Ruby Red dolls on the left. Ruby Red dolls, each about $100, sold only in October and were similar to American Girl dolls with unique personalities and outfits. Their skin was so luminous the little girls looked real.

Third, Micah showed me the wall of Jimmy Fallon games by Hasbro. With the Tonight Show as an upstairs neighbor, FAO pretty much has to include products like the Face It Challenge Party Game and Best Friends Challenge Party Game for Teens & Adults. 

Finally, we entered the delightful FAO selection with its sturdy, high-quality choices of work benches, Vintage Bluetooth Musical Microphones, DJ Mixer Music Floor mats, Ultimate Jewelry Making kits, and Girls’ DIY Henna kits. Food items were big, with a Do It Yourself Gummy Bears Candy Maker for $48 and a Do It Yourself Cake Pop Maker for $32. Hint, this section will most likely be rife with deals on Black Friday.

Now we were in the section for Marvin’s Magic, a company that sells exclusively to Hamleys of Regent Street in central London and FAO Schwarz. We were soon to watch professional magicians demonstrate the Dynamic Coins trick and a card bit from the Mind-Blowing Magic Themed set. Price ranges were reasonable, from $20 to $100 depending on the type of set.

In addition to art easels and race cars (I liked the Remote Control Wrist Racer for $24), we passed big-names like Paw Patrol, UglyDolls, and Hatchimals. My nephews would love the science-based items from #MindBlown that include 4D Anatomy Kit Shark for $32 and the Model Engine Kit for $25.  

Classic Steiff teddy bears and Schleich figurines made me squint to admire the craftsmanship. Toys can be beautiful. 

Yet I was most impressed with the Barbies. 

In addition to the Star Wars collection (an unmasked Darth Vader is really a woman), I loved the David Bowie doll and all of the different shapes and colors of people.

“This is the fashion section,” Micah says pointing to the spectrum of Barbies in casual and evening wear. A few were gender-neutral dolls wearing outfits I might see any New Yorker wear on the street: shorts and patterned T-shirts. However, the biggest shift from decades past was the variety of skin tones. Browns and freckles were welcome. Body types ranged from slim to shapely.

“And this is the career section,” he said. Of course I appreciated the scientist Barbies, but I immediately, I wanted to jump into the hip food truck scenario with Barbie and Ken.

“Literally in every section, there is something new and interactive,” Micah told me in summary of our adventure through the store. “I’m seeing toys that promote the idea of ‘there’s no wrong answer’ and you can have a great time being you.”

Officially over our allotted time—it’s impossible to go through FAO without reverting back to childhood—Micah took me to the giant piano overlooking Rockefeller’s ice rink. I clapped in time while he and a fellow employee danced to “Heart and Soul.”

But before I left, I checked in with Soldier Johnny. Let’s just say, we Clauses know each other, wink wink.

With his wonderful Brooklyn accent, Johnny asked if I were the Mrs. Claus featured last year on Page 3 of the New York Post. I confirmed that yes, I am she—undercover—and still looking for work as a female in Santa-town. A Broadway actor with secret North Pole dealings of his own, Johnny said an elf had pinned that article to a bulletin board in an undisclosed NYC break room, as inspiration.

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Ah Snap!

A smart cookie never reveals his age.

My friend Ginger Snap always causes a stir when I take him into coffee shops. This week, I met him at my favorite Manhattan cafe. Customers sniffed him in line as he stood at their feet texting other ginger folk. He’s fond of emojis and sang along to the playlist of 1990s feminist ballads. Nude except for a casual bow tie and sugar accessories, he grabbed a seat and confided that he hasn’t been himself, even though the giant smile on his face says otherwise. Here, I catch him between 5K runs, something he does several times a day:

Mrs. Claus NYC: Good morning, Ginger Snap. How are you feeling today?

Ginger Snap: Crummy.

Mrs. Claus NYC: I’m so sorry to hear that.

Ginger Snap: I ate too much cookie dough this morning. I over-doughsed.

Mrs. Claus NYC: It can hurt your belly when you eat too many sweets.

Ginger Snap: Tell me about it. I can’t wait to lie down on my cookie sheet and take a nap.

Mrs. Claus NYC: You know, Ginger Snap, I don’t know much about you. How old are you?

Ginger Snap: I’m a food item. It’s not sanitary to discuss age. Do you want the New York Department of Food Safety to find me and lock me up?

Mrs. Claus NYC: Certainly not. Is that your biggest fear?

Ginger Snap: No. My biggest fear is … Shh. Come closer.

Mrs. Claus NYC: I’m listening.

Ginger Snap: Being eaten by the big guy.

Mrs. Claus NYC: You mean Santa?

Ginger Snap: Shh! He might hear you.

Mrs. Claus NYC: He’s in his toy shop. We’re here. How could he hear you?

Ginger Snap: Does Santa ever not hear cookies?

Mrs. Claus NYC: Good point.

Ginger Snap: That’s how I roll. Hey, I’ll let you take three guesses at the decade in which I was first baked.

Mrs. Claus NYC: Okay. I’m very good at this, you know. What’s your favorite band?

Ginger Snap: Oreo Speedwagon.

Mrs. Claus NYC: Aha, you’re from the late 1970s and mid 1980s, somewhere in the “I Can’t Stop This Feeling” era?

Ginger Snap: Try again.

Mrs. Claus NYC: I bet you’re gluten free like someone from the last 10 years.

Ginger Snap: Ha! I’m a total flour child.

Mrs. Claus NYC: Oh, so you’re from the 1960s.

Ginger Snap: Ah, snap.

Mrs. Claus NYC: I’m right, aren’t I?

Ginger Snap: Nope. Wrong again. That was your third try. Gotta run.

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Santa Fashion=Big North Pole $$$

If the suit doesn’t fit, don’t buy it. Hold onto your reindeer and what’s still in your wallet.

photo by Kitt Creative

I will miss being at Charles W. Howard Santa Claus School this year. I went in 2018 for the first time. It’s a special place I describe in this blog post. With Tom and Holly Valent as the directors, the focus is on the “heart of Santa” instead of the business and the busy-ness that can clog one’s mind.

But the business is important. We Clauses all need things to use and wear. At one of the hotels near Santa School, I breezed through the make-shift specialty store and found stickers, North Pole coins, striped socks, jingle bells, and all sorts of costumes—just not the right one for me—yet.

I was struck at just what a huge investment most of us make to become Santas (the gender-neutral word for Santas, Mrs. Clauses, and elves).

At Santa & Co., LLC., which had a display in the hotel, a good Santa robe starts at $699.95. Workshop overalls start at $309.95 because Santa has to have a standard work look. For thin Santas wanting to achieve that “bowl full of jelly” look, there are adjustable vest paddings for $174.95 with shoulder pads for $25 and 2 Kool Packs for $25. (Many Santas say the hardest part of their jobs is how hot they get, and no wonder).

Then there are shirts: button-down or pull-over with laces. Cotton or satin. Belts aren’t just belts but experiences, like the C.W. Howard Style Belt for $189.95 or the Cola Style Belt for $274.95.

Suits cost around $800, worth the investment. They come in a dizzying array of styles: Professional, Cola, New Classic, Classic. Many men I met knew exactly what each of these words meant. The Cola, for example, is based on the old-fashioned Coca Cola ads that emphasize the buttons down the front of the suit with no fur around the neck.

Now let’s talk fashion for Mrs. C.

At the store in the hotel, I tried on a gorgeous colonial dress that was several sizes too large. Right away, I felt it didn’t fit my personality. I felt ridiculous, even though I adored the style and concept. I did love the dresses that matched Santa’s suits. Made of red wool with satin linings and faux fur trim, they were excellent quality but not quite me. But almost.

Online, I’ve been finding offensively sexy outfits like this beauty:

$39.99, Neilyoshop on Amazon Prime. Note the fur booties for … warmth?

No. Uh-uh. I have potholders bigger than this. Tiny elves wear more fabric.

This pretty one has the opposite problem, too much material for a big, animated girl like me. One swoosh of the voluminous skirts, and I knock down everything in my apartment while breaking my neck as I rush down the stairs or get caught in a cab door:

$199.99, Lightinthebox.com on Amazon.

The nice standard ones on Amazon are so cute. I have one, but so does everyone else. And white fur doesn’t do well on the subway, my main form of transportation when I can’t use the sleigh.

What I’m looking for is the Mrs. C version of a Superman suit, something I can change into quickly in a bathroom stall, since NYC telephone booths are a thing of the past. I need something with pockets that looks dressy, like I’m going to Wall Street to check on cookies (and coal) stocks. Something with a high collar and detachable parts: a jacket, a skirt, and a blouse. I’m tall. I can’t hide it. So how about I look taller with vertical stripes? Something relentlessly cheerful in red and green with a bit of humor, a visual pun. This fantasy item must fit into a small NYC closet or a garment bag. No fur, please. Fur turns pink and is stressful.

If all of this sounds like an online dating profile, you’re sort of right.

My future dream garment will be with me for a long time, like a good Santa.

Since I can’t find what I want, I’m designing one—a garment, that is—not a sweetheart.

Related Article: “How To Gift Your Claus Clothing”

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4 Doctors (and 1 Mrs. C) Offer Advice How To Stay Well During The Holidays

Seasonal wellness starts pronto! Yes, even in September.

photo by Kitt Creative

Mrs. Claus here to remind you that the holidays these days start in the fall or sooner. But you can prepare for a healthy beginning, middle, and end to the season, starting with a flu shot now, if you get them.

With less sunlight from Thanksgiving to New Year’s Day, folks become ticking time bombs of illness and depression, all in the name of good cheer.

“Our species is still bound by biology,” said Dr. Robert Hayden, owner of Iris City Chiropractic Center in Griffin, Ga. He expects to heal ballerinas injured performing in The Nutcracker, yet other cases can be more colorful than sugar plums. Imagine a client throwing logs over a fence and coming to the office with an aching shoulder.

“We think we can interrupt good habits during the holidays,” Hayden said. “I’m guilty, too. I think, ‘I’m going to watch that Turner Classic movie until 2 a.m.’ The next day, I wake up feeling sluggish. We can withstand a jolt in the system, but not over the course of a whole month.”

In other words, the delicious, frothy eggnog on your lips might spend a winter on your hips, as well as affecting your feet, neck, skin, back and sleep cycle.

A few years ago, I checked in with doctors in four specialties about holiday health problems. I have some recommendations too. I’m not just a baker, you know, my loves. I also have a MA in Health Education.

Here’s their advice (and mine) to keep you well in a season that seems to start earlier every year:

Foot Care: Dr. Jane Andersen, a podiatrist in Chapel Hill, N.C., said patients travel more frequently this time of year, which means they might be more susceptible to deep vein thrombosis caused by sitting for long periods. If blood clots break loose and lodge in the lungs, the situation can be fatal. To prevent clotting in the legs, Andersen recommends patients take aspirin before boarding an aircraft, wear compression hosiery and allow for frequent movement breaks on the plane or in a roadside rest area.

Andersen’s also concerned by dressy footwear that might spell disaster on slippery pathways after consuming alcohol.

“Shoes are like dessert,” Andersen said. “If you are going to a party, you can plan ahead. You decide, ‘I’m going to wear the pointy high heels, but on the way home, I’ll wear comfortable shoes.’”

During the winter, foot professionals note a rise in neuroma, also known as pinched nerves, and metatarsalgia, characterized by tingling, numbness or shooting pain through the ball of the foot.

Blisters and corns are problems that sound benign until they happen to you. Diabetics who might feel foot numbness must be extremely mindful of trauma related to new shoes.

To get the best fit, Andersen recommends trying on dress shoes at the end of a workday, when the feet are swollen. Pay attention to any pain as a signal that something is wrong and will only get worse. While some people are prone to hammertoes and bunions, issues could quickly escalate if a wearer insists on pushing through the misery.

Varying heel heights can reduce future problems. Stick to a 2-inch height or less, the chunkier the better. Toe boxes should be rounded rather than pointed, and if a party-goer expects to stand for long stretches, a boot or sensible heel would be wiser than platforms.

To reward yourself after a night of wassailing, soak your aching dogs in a bath sprinkled with Epsom salts. Indulge in Vionic slippers with arch supports, a great gift for yourself.

Chiropractic medicine: This time of year, Hayden treats hyper-extended knees from too much standing, necks cranked from guest beds and foreign pillows and tight lower backs from lifting and lowering heavy loads. Poor mechanics while cooking also burden the body.

Less sleep means more stress and irritation exaggerated by high emotions. While the season boosts happiness, a feeling of loss can often coexist with joy, establishing new pain while triggering old musculoskeletal injuries.

“During the excitement, we can try to stay in our routines,” Hayden said. “Keep up the good habits. Then you’ll end up ahead in January.”

Dermatology: Dr. Marie Jhin, a dermatologist in California, said many people forget to remove makeup, drink enough water or get proper amounts of quality sleep during the holidays. Patients might skip medications, contributing to episodes of acne, psoriasis, dry winter skin and eczema.

By New Year’s Day, skin—our largest organ—can look rough from all the binging.

Like Hayden, Jhin recommends hydration, rest and a regimen of general wellness. Avoiding super-hot showers can also prevent skin irritation.

Sleep medicine: As the other doctors mentioned, sleep boosts resilience against an avalanche of health problems.

While many of us can handle one or two alcoholic beverages on occasion, increased intake can have a negative effect on sleep, according to Dr. Darius Zoroufy, medical director at Swedish Medical Center in Seattle.

“Conditions we see at this time of year include insomnia that is seasonal,” Zoroufy said. “Many people have sleep disturbances because of the low outdoor light intensity and short daylight hours. We often see people who gained weight and have been drinking more alcohol than usual, both of which can cause manifestations of sleep apnea to become more obvious.”

Zoroufy recommended a consistent sleep-and-wake schedule, even on vacation. Avoid late nights and long naps. Set limits on sweets and alcohol and wash hands frequently to avoid contracting a respiratory illness that can also affect rest. To feel more alert during the day, consider talking to a doctor about using a therapeutic light box to offset seasonal affective disorder. And for teens who insist on noon wake-ups, negotiate a reasonable structure for a gentler transition back to school.

This piece was adapted from a piece I wrote for Observer.

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photo by Kitt Creative

I admit I am a sidekick in the Christmas pantheon, at least here in the city. But as the world craves female voices, my image evolves. As a Santa friend reminds me, Lois Lane has had several makeovers to stay relevant. Likewise, Mrs. Claus is like a comic book character who experiences updates each decade. I definitely feel a change in my own folkloric DNA that is both exciting and scary. Who am I? Am I old? Am I young?

Some female peers want me to break all the rules and be a feminist warrior. Others are shocked I dare wear anything other than an apron and traditional mob cap, the ruffly hat preferred by Martha Washington. One Santa wanted me to add wrinkles to my youthful complexion, which I might do only in his company. I respect him that much, even though this feels like age-ism in reverse.

Then another St. Nick told me—gasp—that my youth makes Santa look like a “pervert,” his words in the beginning of the #MeToo era. Fellas, I love you so much I’m asking you to put your right hand on the screen and promise me you will never say this to a woman, or ANYONE, ever, especially when that person is trying to be the best version of herself. Banish this thinking from your brains forever, or at least bury it in your inner monologue. I did speak up on that one, and this influential Santa did apologize, as he should.

Yet every choice I make will be wrong in someone’s eyes, so I have to be myself and listen, listen, listen to what feels right. And I have to cheer on other Clauses to do the same. One gorgeous woman I know calls herself Ms. Santa. She is absolutely stunning and in the driver’s seat when it comes to who she is. Oh, how I admire that.

It is still hard to get work in NYC, even though I’m getting promising feedback early in the season. Here is an example through email:

Thank you for contacting us to become part of the [company name deleted] family! I have added you to our database so that we can begin to contact you for jobs in your area. But, if you have some photos, I would love a couple. Could you email some to me? Or, if there are some online somewhere, please let me know where. Also, I let all of our Mrs Claus' know that unfortunately we do not get a lot of work for Mrs Claus. But, we do get some and are getting more every year.

This is WONDERFUL news! One day, we will be trending.

Here’s a thoughtful rejection from a GigSalad client based in Tudor City in Manhattan:

I’m so sorry! We were really just looking for a Santa Claus.
Thank you though!

The 2018 gig called for a St. Nick to hand out presents and pose in pictures, in only 15 minutes. I felt sorry for the poor Santa who took that rushed job. There’s no way a human being can perform such stunts in such a short period of time. A half hour would do the trick, but candy canes! I am grateful to get a response at all.

Here’s another email through GigSalad that was for Christmas Eve 2017 on Christmas Eve 2017 in the Village:

Hi - is this for Mrs Claus or Santa Claus?

The client, whose name was Jonah, was confused. Sweet, sweet Jonah. He couldn’t figure why a silver lady like myself was writing to him instead of a gentleman with a beard. This made me smile. He seemed very stressed. I should have counseled him not to plan a major event with a costumed character on the day of the busiest night of the universe. But I never heard back.

Last week, I finally found the right number to an appropriate office at the New York Stock Exchange. The gentleman on the other end answered with a simple “hello,” nothing else. That’s a sign I found the inner sanctum.

I said, “Is this the New York Stock Exchange?”

“Yes.”

“How do I get on the schedule to ring the bell?”

The gentleman provided an email address. Before I hung up, I quickly introduced myself. “The financial world needs Mrs. Claus to ring the bell,” I said. “For better PR.” He laughed. Isn’t that glorious?

Here is my bull-market pitch to the NYSE through email:

Mon, Sep 9, 12:17 PM

to nysetv

Hi there,

My name is [deleted to maintain the magic]. I am [a] tall, confident Mrs. Claus NYC who dreams of ringing the bell for the New York Stock Exchange during the holiday season. Santa will never lose his place as the king of Christmas, but I am just as nice, if not more efficient and less well paid.

Last year, I won a scholarship to the Charles W. Howard Santa Claus School in Michigan, considered the Harvard of Christmas universities. I was also featured on Page 3 of the New York Post, Marie Claire, and Huffington Post. As a new Mrs. Claus, I have entertained the Clinton family. Here is my website.

I love getting rejections, if that is what is to happen with the NYSE. If people didn’t care, they would ignore me altogether. As you can see, I’m getting very gracious pseudo-“no’s” with honest explanations. I deserve another five cookies.

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